The Psalm

Psalm 38 (CSB)
A psalm of David to bring remembrance.

1 LORD, do not punish me in your anger or discipline me in your wrath.

2 For your arrows have sunk into me, and your hand has pressed down on me.

3 There is no soundness in my body because of your indignation; there is no health in my bones because of my sin.

4 For my iniquities have flooded over my head; they are a burden too heavy for me to bear.

5 My wounds are foul and festering because of my foolishness.

6 I am bent over and brought very low; all day long I go around in mourning.

7 For my insides are full of burning pain, and there is no soundness in my body.

8 I am faint and severely crushed; I groan because of the anguish of my heart.

9 Lord, my every desire is in front of you; my sighing is not hidden from you.

10 My heart races, my strength leaves me, and even the light of my eyes has faded.

11 My loved ones and friends stand back from my affliction, and my relatives stand at a distance.

12 Those who intend to kill me set traps, and those who want to harm me threaten to destroy me; they plot treachery all day long.

13 I am like a deaf person; I do not hear. I am like a speechless person who does not open his mouth.

14 I am like a man who does not hear and has no arguments in his mouth.

15 For I put my hope in you, LORD; you will answer me, my Lord, my God.

16 For I said, “Don’t let them rejoice over me— those who are arrogant toward me when I stumble.”

17 For I am about to fall, and my pain is constantly with me.

18 So I confess my iniquity; I am anxious because of my sin.

19 But my enemies are vigorous and powerful; many hate me for no reason.

20 Those who repay evil for good attack me for pursuing good.

21 LORD, do not abandon me; my God, do not be far from me.

22 Hurry to help me, my Lord, my salvation.

The Prayer

My Everlasting Father, 
I will never forget
  the moment
  when I stood
  and asked for help
I was being tormented 
  and persecuted
  for the sake of sin
  and I have always been low
  because of other people's sin

But those people
  who are not my enemies
  are not in my control.

When I stood
  and I begged,
  "They keep doing this to me,
  help me to control myself
  help me to cease
  giving myself
  the permission to sin
  against the Holy God."

And then
  and only then
  did you send help
  you answered my cries
  and you begun the healing
  and the renewing of the mind.

Even in the midst of your presence
  I got frightened
  as a wounded dog
  and I ran
  because I did not know
  what I was going to do
  or how painful it was going to be.

My God,
  you did not stop
  you did not flinch
  you pursue me
  you sought me out
  when i ran from your sweet love.

And you captured me
  and you continued your work.

Only You,
  could have done this.
  Only you,
  could have set me free
  Only you,
  could have loved me
  in the way that I needed the most.

God,
  write your word
  upon my heart
  and seal it with your Spirit
  and purchase me with your Som
  and make me like your child.

Keep me
  do not lose me
I adore you
  now and always.

Amen.