Love Letter: Amber

holdingMy loveliest Amber,

I love you so very much. I have so many words to write and not enough space to write them all.  But write these words, I will and I will start now.

Your beauty takes my breath away. But you already knew that from the first time I saw you. In that moment I was both stunned and quickened. I knew I had to be with you. I knew I had to desperately and quickly get to know this person who has walked into my life. Remember that moment I went up and offered to get you coffee? In that quick second, I was trying to figure out how to ask you out for dinner. True story. I had to be around you. I had to spend as much time as you will give me just in case I didn’t get to see you again. So asking you out to dinner immediately afterwards was a bit quick and forward but I had to risk it. I had to be with you.  Thank you for saying “Yes” to coffee.

At every turn in our little relationship, I kept asking and for some unknown reason, you kept saying “Yes” until you said “I do”. I have a hard time explaining why that amazes me. The best way I could come up with this time recently where we were dancing and I became overwhelmed at this one singular fact: no one but no one has loved me like you do. There isn’t even a close second place. I thought I knew what it was liked to be love but weirdly enough, that doesn’t match up with what I see in God. Yet, in this time that we have been together, I see how you love me and my little bitty Bible brain keeps confirming, “Ah yes…” over and over again. You love me incredibly. You love me big. You love me more even when my heart doesn’t fully trust you. You love me more when you work with me to see where the root lays in my heart. You love me better because you keep working at my heart that doesn’t love you well at times. By God’s power, you love me. Thank you for growing my heart.

Your beautiful big brain of yours is the perfect helper, the perfect partner, and the perfect opponent for my brain. I came into this marriage with a thousand theories and you have systematically challenged every single one of them. Of all the books I have read, all the hours of studying, the volumes of pages I have written, you have had the greatest influence on how I think and what I know. My doctrine, theology, philosophy, and anthropology feel sharp because you challenge me to think through it all. It was almost as though God knew what he was doing in matching up my heart and my mind. For my soul, he gave me the greatest gift on this earth: you. I love how incredibly smart you are. I love how God has blessed with you such immense amount of wisdom. Thank you for challenging me.

Your soul: I love as well. I love how you love music more than me more than I love music. I love how you respond to the beat, to the strings, to the track, and to the lyrics. Nothing is wasted in a song when it hits your ears. I thought I love music especially when I own 100,000 songs. But I admire your love for music. Thank you for sharing that gift with me.

Amber, it seems to me that you have all the incredible gifts. You can speak. You can prophesy. You can bring encouragement. You can shepherd. You can counsel. You can rightfully and Biblically discern. All of these things are in you because you, my beautiful wife, have the fullness of the Spirit within you. I don’t see you chasing after this event or this speaker or this ritual or this class trying to get more of the Spirit. What I see is that the same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead dwells in you and you go and walk in the Spirit. I never heard you say, “I need more of the Spirit.” What I see you do is being led by the Spirit. You walk in Him as though the Spirit is the Infinite God who gives infinite might to complete the good works that he has laid before you. I preach and teach this but I don’t walk in it perfectly. But you are my gracious and wonderful example of what Paul lays out in Romans 8. When I write/teach/preach my commentary/devotion/book/sermon on Romans, you will be the example I will get to use. Thank you for being the constant example of what it means to be a son of God.

Babe, this letter falls super short of all the things I wanna say. Ugh. Writing is freaking hard.

But I say that to say, I love you baby. I love you now; I am in love with you.

I love you so much I won’t even quote an R&B song.

You know I love you for life because your love is what I need.

And you also know I will give all my love to you and if you need me, baby, I’ll come running only to you.

It is so great that you and I are one after all. You know that our love is so strong. You and I will never stop. You and I will reach the top.

Just know that we have only just begun and the romance is not over.

Whatever it takes to make you happy, baby

Whatever it takes to make you smile

Whatever it takes to make you feel good, baby

I’ll be around

I feel my soul dancing. I feel my soul moving. I feel my soul grooving to the rhythm that keeps beating out your name.

I am ready to love you forever. Hey lover now, come love me forever more.

I love you, Amber. A million times more. I love you.

 

Love,

Joseph

Published by

Joe Louthan

A theophilus. Heart being healed. Hella Calvinist. Ex-Evangelical. PoliticalAF. #BlackLivesMatter.